


With Every Move I Die

by Lilly_C



Series: Salt Skin Trilogy [3]
Category: Taggart (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Complicated Relationships, F/M, Family, Father-Daughter Relationship, Illnesses, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Not Canon Compliant, Original Character(s), Post-Canon, Post-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-29
Updated: 2010-12-29
Packaged: 2018-01-11 14:44:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1174320
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lilly_C/pseuds/Lilly_C
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You wanna reach out and touch my hand.</p>
            </blockquote>





	With Every Move I Die

**Author's Note:**

> No spoilers.
> 
> Sequel to Salt Skin and Further Than A Heartbreak.
> 
> Set three years after Further Than A Heartbreak.
> 
> Aithne is mine.
> 
> Any mistakes are my own and unintentional.

Robbie was reclining on the couch, Aithne his three year old daughter was sitting on his knee, her head resting on his belly. “Is mummy cross with me?” she enquired, looking up at the calming influence in her life.

“Of course not sweetie. Why do you think she's cross?” he said, pushing her long fringe out of her eyes.

“Because I told Uncle Matt,” she stopped.

Confusion danced across Robbie's features. “What did you tell Uncle Matt?”

The little girl looked up at her father. “I told him that mummy drinks funny tasting water from a big bottle.”

Robbie held her close, soothingly rubbing her forehead. “You're not in any trouble honey,” he reassured her, kissing her on the cheek. “Has mummy said something?” he asked, unintentionally worrying about the two most important people in his life.

Aithne responded by shaking her head and squeezing her cow tighter.

“I'll talk to mummy tonight,” Robbie promised.

“What do you say to a bedtime story?” he asked, carrying the child up the stairs.

“From my Peppa Pig book, daddy.”

*

Staring at the clock was becoming a habit, an unwanted fixation. Most nights he watched it taunt him as he sat and waited for Jackie to return home, quietly hoping that she'd be back in time to tuck their daughter in and kiss her goodnight but also hoping that she wasn't drunk.

The last part had been wishful thinking for a while.

“Where are you?” he muttered to himself as the front door closed.

He sighed heavily, easing himself out of the armchair. “Jack?” he softly called out.

“What?” she hissed, stumbling as she unzipped her boots.

Robbie simply shook his head at her. “I'm supposed to be the fuck up,” he commented and walked away.

“What's that supposed to mean?” she slurred, awkwardly following him into the living room. “Answer me!”.

“I was merely pointing out a fact, Jackie.”

“So I had a drink, so what?”

Robbie clenched and unclenched his fist, attempting to control his anger.

“A drink? No, Jacqueline, you have had the offy, beer cellar and brewery. You're even drinking during the day when you're not at work.”

“Yeah and?” She spat.

“Aithne thinks that your cross with her, thinks that she has done something wrong. Do you have any idea how hard it is telling a three year old that it's something for the grown ups to sort out?”

Jackie was about to respond, when the door opened ajar, a small hand resting on the door frame. “Hiya honey,” she said, joyfully greeting the child.

Aithne gasped and ran away, trying to get up the steps as quickly as she could without tripping.

Robbie glared at her. “I'll go. I always do. You stay down here and sober up.”

*

Jackie softly groaned as the smell of potato cakes drifted throughout the house. When she wasn't hungover she welcomed the comforting scent but all it was doing was making her feel more nauseated. “Robbie?” she softly called out knowing he wouldn't hear her calls.

She waited a beat before getting up, throwing on Robbie's work shirt, the first thing she grabbed hold of. She fastened a few buttons, easing into her slippers and made her way downstairs.

“I've got no sympathy,” Robbie stated as he handed her a mug of coffee.

Jackie rolled her eyes at him. “I wasn't looking for any. When are you going to work?”

“After I've dropped Aithne off at the childminders. Why?”

Looking around the room for inspiration, Jackie whispered. “I wanted to spend the day with my family.”

Robbie scoffed at her suggestion. “Family? Family? Do you even know what that means any more?”

“Why are you been like this Robbie?” she snapped.

Robbie turned to face her. “Because you're always drunk. You're daughter is scared of you and she doesn't understand that none of it, especially your behaviour is not her fault.”

Jackie bit on her lip, a solitary tear rolling down her cheek. “I guess I'm struggling with things,” she solemnly admitted.

“What things honey?” Robbie enquired, putting his hands on her waist. “Talk to me. I can't do anything for you when you're silent.”

“It's the job and being a mum. I can't do both. I want to do both and I need to do both.”

“Have to do both,” he corrected.

“Yeah and I'm finding it harder and harder to separate work from home. The last few cases I've had, have involved kids and most of them are Aithne's age. It scares me that something bad is going to happen to her at any moment.”

Robbie held her tighter as her tears fell more freely. “Shush,” he uttered, gently kissing the top of her head. “You've got to tell Matt, I'm sure he'll understand. Maybe give you some time off..”

Aithne announced her presence, loudly saying. “Daddy, can we go now?”

Robbie glanced over Jackie's shoulder at their child. “In a minute sweetheart. Mummy needs a hug.”

“Hurry up,” she demanded.

Jackie chuckled softly at the girl's demands. “I know where she gets her demanding streak from,” she commented, quickly giving Robbie a peck on the cheek as they drew apart.

“Talk to Matt, Jackie,” he said as he made his way out of the house.

*

Jackie grabbed her coat and left the office, quickly making her way outside to her car.

She was about to get in when she heard her name been called. She looked back and smiled when she spotted Robbie carrying Aithne down the steep hill. She waved at them as they approached.

Robbie handed the girl to Jackie for her to hold her for while. “She is getting heavy.”

“It's all the millions and Irn Bru you let her have,” she teased. “I'm on leave for a month. You were right Rob, talking to Matt helped. So I was thinking that maybe we could go on holiday, maybe go abroad.”

“I can't. I'm sorry,” Robbie said coyly as he secured his little girl in her safety seat.

Jackie wiped her eyes. “Why not?” she growled.

“My boss wants me to work the six to eleven shift everyday for the next three weeks. Maybe you and Aithne could go somewhere for a few days.”

Jackie got in the driver's side. “No, it's fine,” she choked turning the engine over. Robbie got in before she had chance to drive off and leave him at the station.

The drive back to the house had been awkward and mostly silent except for a few minor disagreements over the choice of radio station. They were both thankful that Aithne had been tired out by the child minder and slept for the majority of the short journey.

*

“Thanks for the lift, Matt,” Robbie said as he got out the car. “Do you wanna come in for a bit? I think there's some pizza left.”

Matt noticed the worry in Robbie's eyes. “Aye, I will.”

A few minutes later the men were inside the house. “Jackie?” Robbie called out.

When didn't get a response he looked upstairs, while Matt looked downstairs.

“Robbie, in here,” Matt shouted from the foot of the stairs.

Robbie ran the steps three at a time, running into the living he covered his mouth to prevent an anguished scream escaping.

“I've already rang for an ambulance, told them no lights and sirens,” Matt said as he watched Robbie gingerly approach his unconscious fiancé, crouching beside her he checked for a pulse, heaving a sigh of relief when he detected very faint life signs.

“I gotta get her to hospital,” he panicked.

Matt put his hands on Robbie's shoulders as they watched Jackie being loaded into the ambulance. “Deep breaths son.”

“Thank you,” he whispered. “Wait, who's gonna watch Aithne? I don't want her to see Jackie in this state.”

“I'll watch her and when madam over there comes to I'll bring her up to see here.”

“Right, thanks, I'll ring you when I know something.”

*

Robbie glanced up when he felt Jackie's hand involuntarily twitch in his. “Morning sweetheart,” he softly greeted.

“Wires?” she questioned, confusion creeping onto her features.

“You're in hospital. You were unconscious when I got back. Matt was with me and he's looking after Aithne.”

“What's wrong with me?” she asked hoarsely.

Robbie squeezed her hand tighter. “Robbie?”

He tried avoiding making eye contact with her. “They did some tests when they brought you in and you have Hepatitis C. The doctors said that your liver is in the early stages of cirrhosis.”

“How is that….?” Jackie paused, briefly thinking back to an incident with a heroin addict who stabbed her with a dirty needle. “It couldn't be from that?”

Robbie flashed a curious glance at her. “Couldn’t be from what babe?”

“About twenty years ago I arrested a drug addict and I remember feeling something sharp go into my shoulder. I saw the force doctor and he give me a tetanus injection as a precaution. It couldn't be from that could it?”

Robbie shrugged. “Maybe. We best tell the doctors about it.”

Jackie shook her head at him. “leave it Rob.”

*

Matt crouched down beside Aithne. “Who's that?” he asked as Robbie came into view.

“Daddy,” Aithne squealed as she sprinted to him. She held her arms out. “Up,” Robbie smiled at her and picked her up, going back to Matt.

“Where's mummy?”

Robbie pointed down the long corridor. “She's down there sweetie. I know she wants to see you, she misses you.”

“Go, I'll wait here.”

Robbie took his daughter to the room where her mother was currently been treated. He sat her on the bed and left them alone for a few minutes so that he could talk to Matt in the corridor.

“It doesn't make any sense Matt. Why won't she tell the doctors about the needle stick injury. I know it happened over twenty years ago but it could be a factor in her illness.”

“What illness?” Matt asked, as every medical condition known to man whirled around in his head. “Robbie?”

Robbie sighed in frustration. “Jackie's got Hepatitis C, the doctor says that her liver is in the early stages of cirrhosis. I swear it, she wasn't sick. Sure, she was tried a lot and at times she was off her food but I put that down to the stress of the job and not something serious.”

“Don't blame yourself Robbie.” Matt squeezed his arm. “You couldn't known any of this would happen. With the right treatment she'll get better.”

“Yeah, she will. It's just a bit of a shock I guess, knowing that she's sick and even with treatment may or may not get better.” Robbie gently smiled. “I best get back to her and Aithne.”

*

Regardless of the time of day or even the year, Glasgow airport was always a madman's dream come true. If you liked been pushed around and hit by stressed out, over zealous tourists that is. 

Robbie carried their luggage while Jackie carried Aithne on her shoulders. She chuckled whenever the little girl yelled. “Princess and queen.” Robbie's nicknames for his girls.

“Next time we're going for longer,” Jackie stated.

“Even though you got sunburn?”

Jackie softly laughed. “What can I say Rob, I'm a typical Glaswegian. Five minutes of sunshine and I turn lobster red.”

“There are no words,” he replied, rolling his eyes.

Once they were in the car park, Aithne pointed to Matt's car. “Uncle Matt,” she said delightedly. 

They went to where their boss had parked, rapping on the window to get his attention. “Get the boot open,” Jackie commanded.

“How was Brisbane?” he enquired as he popped the boot and opened the back door.

“It was very hot,” Aithne answered matter of factly.

Once the four of them were fastened in he started the engine and drove them to their home. 

*

Jackie was sitting on the living room floor, going through all the pictures they took on her laptop. She smiled at the one of her, Robbie and Aithne holding the snake at the zoo. She quickly transferred the file and set it as her desktop background. 

A wave of nausea hit her as she tried to stand up. She held onto the coffee table for support, before giving up. She tried calling out but she blacked out before the words could escape.

“Do you want a brew?” Robbie called from the kitchen. “Jackie?” when she didn't answer he went into the living room. “Oh fuck no!” 

He put her into the recovery position and sent a quick text to Matt before attempting to move her and carry to the car. “Hold on honey,” he repeated frantically.

On his way out, he passed Matt, “Aithne's in bed. Keys are by the door.”

“Just go son. I've got everything under control.”

What none of them knew was that Aithne had seen Robbie put Jackie on the back seat and drive off.

She quickly left her bedroom. “I want to go with mummy!” she yelled.

Matt glanced up the stairs. “In the morning, sweetness.”

“No now!”

Matt went to the distressed child, sneakily smirking at her demanding streak. He pulled her into a comforting hug. “Mummy's going to be fine,” he reassured her, stroking her hair.

“She looked dead!” she wailed.

“She isn't dead honey,” He continued to comfort the girl. “It's a side effect of her illness.” 

Aithne pouted at her uncle. “Don't believe you.”

“I'll tell you what we'll do darling. In the morning we'll buy mummy a card and some flowers and we'll go and see her in the hospital.”

“No! Go now.”

Matt gently shook his head. “All right, all right,” he said as he got them to their feet. “Where is your coat?”

“Door.” Retrieving the coat, Matt got them out of the house and to his car, quickly making their way to the hospital.

*

“How is she?” Matt enquired as he spied Robbie sat on one of the metal chairs, his head in his hands.

“Not good,” he mumbled, between heavy heartbroken sobs. “Daddy,” Aithne said, tugging on his jacket sleeve.

Matt raised his hands in surrender. “She wouldn't settle.”

“It's all right.”

“Mr Ross?” the haggard looking doctor asked.

Robbie looked up at the equally dishevelled man. “What's wrong with her?”

“It's not her hepatitis. I'd better let her tell you.”

Robbie looked at Aithne. “Wait here with Uncle Matt honey. Please.”

“Okay daddy,” she smiled bleakly.


End file.
